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How Not to Make Eggplant Parmesan

You know how there are how to’s and tutorials pretty much everywhere you look on the internet? Ever feel overwhelmed with this abundance of helpful advice?

Well you’re in luck, because I’m here to tell you how NOT to make eggplant parmesan. Follow my instructions, and you will end up with some sort of weird eggplanty/corndogy/dry patty concoction for dinner – sound remotely appetizing? Yeah, I didn’t think so.

Step 1: Find an awesome Eggplant Parmesan recipe like this one

Step 2: Ignore the aforementioned directions and mix ALL of the ingredients together – and I mean EVERYTHING – into what becomes a cement-like mixture that you’re pretty sure will have to be chiseled out of the bowl

Step 3: Attempt to salvage your breading by packing it around the slices of eggplant you so lovingly cut and let sweat for 30 minutes

Step 4: Put in oven

This is what your results should look like:

Step 6: Serve it to a loved one and watch them try to smile through dinner

Seriously though. How did I mess this up?! It really ended up tasting pretty good, but the texture was completely off. Next time I’ll have to monitor what I’m actually dumping into the dipping and breading mixtures. Oops!

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